Ah, February the 14th. For inexplicable reasons, this unique date conjures up images in my head redolent of many years gone by when I was a lot more active on the dating scene.

I often reminisce about couples impeccably attired in their sartorial elegance, batting their eyelashes at one another across the soft glow of an intimate candlelit dinner.

I picture a pristine white tablecloth elegantly draped between them almost reaching the floor.

Hidden beneath, from the world’s prying eyes, their feet would engage in a playful, secret dance of their own acting as a whisper of affection.

The table would be adorned with shimmering cutlery and glimmering crystalware.

Intermittently, one would hear the soft clinking of fine china. To add another layer of excitement to the day’s charming atmosphere, there would be exchanges of red roses and heart-shaped chocolate boxes.

Romantic Roots Regarding The 14th February

But, even to this day, I pondered and asked myself, “What is the real story behind this day dripping in luxurious romance peppered with rouge everywhere?”

Delving historically, the origins of Valentine’s Day are murky, with several legends vying for an eminently plausible reason behind this day’s origin.

Some claim it commemorates several martyred Saints named Valentine or Valentinus, two of whom were decapitated during the third century A.D. by the Roman Emperor Claudius II Gothicus.

Others link it to ancient Roman Pagan festivals where priests of the order Lupercalia would sacrifice a goat for fertility and a dog for purification.

According to the ancient writer Plutarch, the priests would skin the goat and turn the hide into strips before dipping them into sacrificial blood. They would then wander the streets and proceed to slap single women with their crafted animal skins while warding off evil spirits.

Women were, however, fearless and welcomed this whipping ritual because it was believed to make them more fertile in the coming year.

According to legend, all the young women in the city would subsequently place their names in a large urn. The city’s bachelors would each select a name and become paired for the year with his chosen woman.

Lupercalia survived the initial rise of Christianity but was outlawed for it was deemed “un-Christian”, but in 496 AD, Pope Gelasius officially declared February 14th as St. Valentine’s Day.

The oldest known Valentine greeting still in existence today was a poem written in 1415 by Charles, Duke of Orléans, to his wife while he was imprisoned in the Tower of London following his capture at the Battle of Agincourt.

Whilst incarcerated and before his execution, he wrote her a letter, signing it “From your Valentine.” Whether or not this was a romantic gesture is debatable.

Regardless of its exact starting point, Valentine’s Day gradually evolved into a celebration of love, affection and appreciation.

Fast forward to the 21st century and Valentine’s Day has become, well almost, a global phenomenon, including Australia. But beneath the glitz and glitter, there lurk some captivating curiosities.

Fascinating Facts about February 14th

• No one really knows the origin of the ❤️ shape. One possibility is that it resembles the now-extinct plant silphium. Once found in the African city-state Cyrene, the plant was used as food colouring, cough syrup, and, most notably, a contraceptive.
  
• Cupid, the naked cherub, has its roots deep in Greek mythology with the God of Love, Eros, from where the word “erotic” is derived. Cupid was the son of the Roman goddess, Venus. He carried two arrows in his quiver, one made of gold to make people fall in love and one made out of lead to make people despise one other.
  
• Valentine’s Day is not celebrated worldwide. It is banned or discouraged in many countries, including Saudi Arabia, Uzbekistan, Indonesia, Iran, Pakistan and Malaysia.
  Amongst certain Islamic religious clerics, this day is blamed for being a gateway to disaster and moral decay among young people.
  In fact, in 2014, Gulf News reported that five Saudi citizens were sentenced to prison or publicly lashed after they admitted to dancing with and having illicit relations with unrelated women.
  

Back To Terra Australis

• Card Crazy: Aussies send over 50 million Valentine’s Day cards yearly, second only to Christmas.
  
• Choc-o-Mania: Aussies devour an alarming 8,000 tonnes of chocolate during this sweet season.
  
• Petal Power: Red roses reign supreme, with over 12 million blooms sold “Down Under”.
  

But amidst the rosy glow, whispers of discontent arise. Some view Valentine’s Day as a manufactured marketing ploy, designed to exploit emotions and inflate prices.

They argue it pressures singles to feel inadequate and couples to conform to unrealistic expectations.

Love-Hate or Hate-Love?

“Pros” – Priceless Passion:

• Celebrating love: For many, it’s a chance to express affection and appreciation for loved ones, strengthening bonds and creating cherished memories.
  
• Boosting businesses: Restaurants, florists and gift shops see a welcome boom, providing a financial shot in the arm.
  
• Spreading joy: Whether it’s a sweet card or a thoughtful gesture, acts of kindness ripple outwards, creating a more positive atmosphere.

“Cons” – Cupid rhymes with stupid:

• Commercialisation: The focus on expensive gifts and extravagant gestures can overshadow the true meaning of the day. Australians are set to spend $465 million this Valentine’s Day (down 4.1% or $20 million from 2023) as cost-of-living pressures clip Cupid’s wings. (Read more about the cost-of-living crisis in my blog here).
  According to The Guardian (UK), “anti-Valentine’s” balls and “broken-hearted discos” where attenders can only dance to famous songs about relationship break-ups are becoming a reality in the U.K..
  And then cards reading, “Meh” or “Happy unimaginative consumerist entirely arbitrary manipulative shallow interpretation of romance day”, have been circulated by Britons who refuse to buy in to mainstream celebrations.
  
• Pressure to perform: Singles can feel ostracised, and couples are pressured to live up to unrealistic ideals, leading to stress and disappointment.
  
  (If you need more clarification regarding various modern-day relationship terms, read my blog here.)
  
• Environmental impact: The mass production of cards, flowers in plastic wrapping paper and decorations contributes to waste and carbon emissions.
  
  (Read more about climate change issues in my series of blogs here).

Beyond The Hype

Ultimately, Valentine’s Day is what you make it. It doesn’t have to be a Hallmark holiday dictated by commercial interests.

Instead, I view it as an opportunity to celebrate love in all its forms – romantic, platonic and self-love.

How To Spark Joy Without Breaking Your Heart Or The Bank

• Write a heartfelt letter: Express your appreciation for loved ones, friends, or even yourself – words hold more power than any store-bought item.
  
• Go “green”: Opt for eco-friendly gifts like potted plants or experiences like a picnic in your local park if the weather permits.
  
• Volunteer together: Share your love with the community by donating your time or skills to a worthy cause.
  (You can read more about my passion for performing voluntary work here).
  
• Embrace self-care: Treat yourself to a relaxing bath, a good book, or a creative hobby – self-love is the foundation for healthy relationships.

Remember, love is more than just one day on the calendar. Shouldn’t every day should be Valentine’s Day to express your gratitude and appreciation?

Mates Before Dates?

And if you’re intent on eschewing that special day as a single woman or man or have been putting off that long-awaited get-together with your close friends, why not indulge in a “Galentine’s“, “Malentine’s“, or “Palentine’s” date specifically reserved for the 13th February?

Either that, or perhaps it’s a day for you to celebrate with your mistress and manstress if you’re cheating on your regular partner?

In any case, let Valentine’s Day be a gentle reminder to nurture the connections that enrich your life, express gratitude and spread kindness throughout the year.

Happy ❤️ day, Aussie style, if you’re that way inclined!

Or perhaps I should say “Make the most of S.A.D.” – aptly standing for “Single Awareness Day.”

Comments welcome below.

About the author

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Dr Surrinder Singh is a medical doctor, blogger and freelance writer. He is passionate about healthcare, medicine and education and works professionally with B2B and B2C clients.